Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
