youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
