She was like a white Oprah, but with less conviction.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
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