I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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