I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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