You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
