Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
