I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
