I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
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