Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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