it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
