Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
