Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize