How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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