someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize