you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
