if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
