i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
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Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
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Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
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