my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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