Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
