You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
please come you make the beer taste better
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.