turn off your phone and go to bed
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.