Having a random hookup so left but love u
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
You ate ashes out of my bong
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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