It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
