I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
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Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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