a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
