is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
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