i already hear my dad disowning me
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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