that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
When are your genitals available?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize