Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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