I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
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