He uses pillows to masturbate.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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