Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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