Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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