Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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