Kiss
Puke
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
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I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
You brought string cheese to the strip club
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
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