wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
These 19 People Had Awkward Celebrity Sex Dreams
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.