If that was your dad, he is hot
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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