2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
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there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
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Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
God, I missed his penis.
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