ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
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