oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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