who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
he fucked my hip out of place.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.