this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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