That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
She said her name was "party"
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
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