Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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