doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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