You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Randomize
