Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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