So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.
i think you have the wrong number
so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God gave him joint rollers for hands
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
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