I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
So many bounce houses so little time
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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