you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
